PLACING VALUE ON MENTAL AND PHYSICAL HEALTH:

Deleting a friend’s number, breaking up with them or limiting the time one spends with them, including whether they are family or not, may feel uncomfortable in the short term and even grieve for such loss of the relationship. But, it is important while going through the potential of such occurrence to place the outcome compared to the value of one’s mental and physical health.

Sometimes it becomes necessary to block people in real life, but it may just mean that providence has made it happen because one has outgrown such relationship that you would have naturally let go of in the past when there were no phones, internet, etc Today, we stay more connected for a longer period as a result of social media, telephone and ease of intercontinental travels.

In many ways, it can be considered a good thing and beneficial as good friendship enrich our lives. Good memory strengthens our sense of identity and purpose and bonds our relationships. Happy memories are an important ingredient in present happiness. but it can also be bad if you are maintaining relationships with toxic people, negatively impacting your life and mental health judiciously, particularly on social media where people get away with bullying and all sorts of offensive postings and confrontations.

The connectivity is not the problem. The medium of social media is merely an avenue for communication. The same people, the majority of them are simply expressing the deep negative personality they are exhibiting, hiding behind computers and phones. Keeping in touch with  toxic people in your life, regularly exposing your brain to their thought processes and will impact your personality and thought process negatively in the long run

The simple reasoning here is, what you expose your thoughts to regularly, listen to or people you hear on daily basis with their toxic or negative messages and conversation can directly or indirectly affect your mental state and eventually, your physical health.

For instance, constantly complaining persons can influence your relationship, belief system or trust level or possibly shape your beliefs about relating generally. Maintaining positive and trusting friendships on the other hand could be the key to a sharper and happier memory. Continual complaints about life may develop fear about life generally, and often end up being unhappy.

Toxic persons can only add negativity and upsetting thoughts to one’s life. Often, such persons are toxic because they are dealing with their issues and traumas which they can only deal with in the best possible ways they know how, and that is to sink deeper into further misery and negativity. To do so, they act in ways that don't present them in the best light and usually always upsetting others.

Recognizing a “toxic person” is more about identifying how they make one feel rather than what they do or says. If you're interacting with a person with toxic behaviour, you may: feel confused and unsure of yourself. feel drained, angry, frustrated, or full of anxiety. Sometimes, simply hearing or seeing their call can be upsetting, causing anxiety, frustration or afterwords, hurtful. Sometimes, this is done unintentionally but at other times, on purpose. They may feel bad about themselves, so they make other people around them feel bad, too. Misery loves company.

Dealing with toxic people requires tact and seeing them for who they are; so, it is best to avoid playing into their reality, not getting drawn to their level, and paying attention to how they make you feel if you can, which often may be impossible, talk to them about their behaviour and as best protect your self; offering compassion, empathy to their situation but don't attempt to fix them. Most of all, always remember it is not your fault if you have anything to do with whatever is the cause of the situation. However it may have happened, their reaction would still be the same negative, toxic and rubbing everyone with their noxious behaviour.

It doesn’t mean you have to get rid of everyone negative. It is simply important not to let such negativity change or rub off on you.

Courage is the fundamental word within encouragement. Courage is needed to do many things in our life which require pushing ourselves or attempting to step out of our comfort zone. Courage is what you need to be able to delete or remove toxicity from your life. According to Oliver Wendell Holmes, “The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." And Pablo Casals says, “It takes courage for a person to listen to his goodness and act on it." To therefore surround oneself with people who could keep one vulnerable, stunt growth or ability to venture can be self-defeating; a way of self-sabotaging. Or, a way of discouraging chasing dreams. Truth be told, some negativity and extreme criticism are warranted based on circumstances or settings. However, if someone is chronically negative or has a negative response to all things, that is a red flag because it could affect your ability to make a key decision about moving forward and taking necessary risks.